Wednesday, February 15, 2012

February 15, 2012

Dear Diary,


WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!

Ok. Deep breaths. Maybe that's a bad angle...


Nope. Not the angle. It looks like that stupid vacuum robot covered in hair!!!! That's not a dog!!!! And that vacuum is evil and demented and must be smashed. I don't trust it. And don't cover it in hair and think that I can be fooled! I digress...

This is a dog....


She's me on stilts! She's German!! (Ok, her name is Fifi, but she's German at heart...) THAT is a dog. It's not as great as this Dachshund....

But. Whatever. Injustice. Why should I be so surprised at life being so horrible to me?? Did I get a consolation steak last night??? No. Did I get snuggled all night? Oh, yeah, I did... BAH. I don't even get to complain about lack of snuggles!!!!!! MISERY. 

I need to eat some socks. 

Sincerely, 
Beans A. Wienerdog

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